Shit I Learned in 2013

I try my best not to sound so cynical about everything, but sometimes, the world just tries to pull one on me and turns me into this pessimistic (yet realistic) monster. 2013, I would have to say, was not my year. Sure, there were "numerous blessings" -- and don't get me wrong, I'm not discounting those.. but in essence, it could have definitely been better.

I turned 20, in 2013 -- a pivotal time in my life, as I had dreaded this day since I was young. I've always had the notion that life ends at 20. It's a little dramatic to say the least, but I honestly believe that my best years are behind me.. I know a lot of people will disagree with me on that and say that "Life starts at 20!" (or 40, whichever). I mean, gone are the years of my happy go lucky lifestyle. I now had to start being more responsible, and for someone with my personality, it's a bit much to handle.

Being the poster child for all Aries signs, and I quote "The #Aries goal in life is safety. The climbing, the power, the success -- it's all about feeling safe." -- I took 2013 by the horns and took control (or tried at least). The challenges and opportunities 2013 presented to me, made me learn a couple of things that I surely won't forget as I grow older and as I welcome this new year. I wouldn't necessarily say that 2013 made me a better person, because, there is so much room for improvement in my life, but it did change me in more ways than one. Thanks for being a bitch 2013, cause without you, I still would've been the naive fresh DLSU grad I was.

1. Do your laundry regularly.
For anyone who has lived alone, this is of utmost importance. You wouldn't want to be caught in a situation wherein you're down to your last underwear with class the next day and no underwear left.. I think this is the most important lesson 2013 taught me. 2013 -1 Carla - 0

2. Socialize even if you don't want to.
Most people would say I'm an extrovert, but I would say I'm a closeted introvert. I rarely reply to texts (except if your name is Cha, Je, or Isabel), avoid phone calls at all costs, mark Facebook messages as unread even if I have already read them, and basically just tune everyone out.. although, my numerous posts on Instagram and regular partying in the middle of 2013 would suggest otherwise. Having lived alone in a place without any friends or family, I cannot assert this enough that socializing is of utmost importance. Whether you like hanging out and talking to people or not, socializing is just a part of human survival. Being around people, talking, and just seeing human interaction is enough to keep you sane and to keep those homesick jitters away. Plus, networking will ALWAYS do you good.

3. Learn to walk away from something that does not/will not do you good. 
When I say this, I am talking not just talking about relationships.. I am also talking about consumer goods. Haha! When I was younger (around 5-7 months ago), I had the habit of entering a store and ALWAYS leaving with something in hand.. especially if there was a sale going on. I felt as if it were my moral obligation to buy a product for less than its worth. I felt like the product deserved to be bought even though I didn't need it. With that, I also saw me quickly burning a hole in my savings account for things that I could ultimately live without. Same goes for people.. Try your best not to burn yourself out by making time and putting effort in relationships that do not make you feel good about yourself anymore. In the long run, you'll be saving yourself from a shitload of unnecessary drama that yet again -- you can and should live without.

4. EXERCISE.
In 2012, I remember I was the stoutest I had ever been. In October of that year, my dad passed away from multiple complications. He had a bad heart, diabetes, and continued to smoke at least 1 pack of cigarettes a day. I am predisposed to these sicknesses because both my parents' families have them, and gaining pound after pound at an alarming rate really made me stop and rethink my lifestyle. So in 2013, I decided I would lessen my intake of unhealthy food -- keyword being LESSENED.. I still have a burger & fries every so often.. and pizza. PIZZAAAAAAA. But on most days, I just eat salads and fruits. Also, I signed up for the gym in uni and got addicted to running and yoga. Running became so therapeutic for me.. Whenever I'd have a bad day, I would put on my workout gear and go to the gym and just run for half an hour and take a yoga class after. Same went if I wanted to have a good day -- nothing boosted my energy and disposition than a good run before a class. I wasn't only exercising to be fit, I was doing it to feel good which made it feel less torturous but more therapeutic.

5. Nothing in excess.
If there is one bad habit I have that really pesters me and keeps me up at night, it's doing too much of everything. I shop too much, curse too much, pick others apart too much, eat too much, stay up too late, work too hard (sometimes), and most of all... and definitely the most sinful of all... I love too much. Man, you should see me obsess over the smallest things. A bag, a color, a blanket, a book, a character, a TV series, and the occasional person. Everything in moderation is really what I should implement this new year.

6. Work hard for what you want.
Back in college, I was set on getting 1.0s. Mainly because I had a thriving social life, an online business that was at its peak, a great relationship, and lots of time to sleep. I took the easy way out by letting my grades suffer and relishing every passing moment. But these "moments" in life, will not get you into a good graduate school program, and it will not get you a job. You know what will? Good grades, extra curricular activities, and internships. After graduating, as I was preparing for my Graduate Record Exam (GRE), I had a hard time applying to schools abroad, mainly in the US because I had a low GPA and no professor willing to write me a letter of recommendation because I didn't stand out in their class or simply because they thought I was not ready to enter grad school. However, instead of feeling discouraged by all of this, I transformed all the negativity into something positive. I applied for an internship at a prominent nonprofit organization based in New York with an office here in Makati. I interned for Asia Society, thrived during my time there, and next thing I knew, I found myself accepting my offer at one of the top universities in the world. I worked my butt off in grad school, and found my grades more than pleasing at the end of the semester. Now, I have an edge in my field and in the work force. Same goes for your passions in life -- not just with work. If you want to have that dream body you constantly talk about -- put in your hours at the gym, eat healthier food, and drink lots of water. Stay committed to the bit. If you want a happy and healthy relationship -- you have to work hard at it too. Find the time to tell your partner everyday that you love them, show them how much you do, and hope for the best. Working hard for what you want isn't an assurance that you'll actually get what you want. I've seen people put their hearts into what they do, and they still don't walk away with the grand prize. Sometimes, it's really not in your fate to have something or to experience it.. but working hard is a good lesson enough in itself that teaches you so much more about life than just winning.

2014 has so far, proved to be fickle for me, but I keep on looking back at these 6 things I've written about, to remind me of what I should do in any situation I'm faced with. I hope you, my dear reader, find some sense in all of this as I have written this sporadically under the influence of alcohol, some other things, and insomnia. Wishing this year will be an amazing one for you x